XMAS CAROLS FOR THE MENTALLY CHALLENGED

This time of year we tend to go little insane, so here is some humor to get us throuhh, plus some links for even more Christmas jocularity

YOU'RE FROM BOSTON

Your know you're from Boston if.....
(20 ways to tell if someone comes form the Hub.)

The ICE RINK

Christmas was approaching. Ebben & Elijah decided to build an ince rink in the north field.....

MULTITASKING NOMENCLATURE

Names for some of the tasks we do,
but really shouldn't.

WILL ROGERS quotes

OK, he wasn't from New England. In fact he said his people greeted the Mayflower when it arrived, but his humor is American & timeless. Here are a bunch of his quotes. (read more)

AT THE POST OFFICE

Ebben's cousin, once removed, Ellington, married a woman with a unique spin on the world. She was by no....(read more)

BURLINGTON

Like many a good New Englander,
Ebben was getting his house winter ready.
The storm...

MOTHERS

Ebben's son checks out
an unusual book from
the library.

A RECENT STUDY

California is often the place
where trends and studies start.
This study looks at how women
look at men.

ELEVATOR HUMOR

Elevators are strange places.
People crammed together, not speaking
Here a few ways to break the ice.

FATHER'S DAY JOKE

Yeah, dads get a lot of grief,
but we just couldn't resist.
Here a few humorous jabs at dad.

MOLE HOLE
Jed was a country boy from the get go. He was born and raised in rural Vermont.

When he finally married, it was to Kate, a very nice city girl.

Their first house was a modest affair, but they took pride in their yard and garden.

When moles started ravaging the grass, Jed set traps....READ MORE

DEAD DOG

Jed runs into his vet's office carrying the limp body of Elvis, his favorite hunting dog. He was yelling for help. Doc Brown rushes him back to an examination room and has him put his Elvis down on the examination table. Doc Brown examines the still, limp body and after a few moments tells the man that Elvis has left the house; he is sadly dead.

Jed can't believe it and won't willing to accept it. He insists on a second opinion.

The doct goes into the back room and come out....READ MORE

GOING TO HARVARD
A college bound North Carolinian came up to the Boston area to look at schools.

After visiting BU, BC, MIT, Northeastern, he finally went to Harvard Square.

When he finished checking out that august institution....READ MORE

THINGS MOM NEVER SAID
Mother's are always trying to make us sit up straight, stop fidgeting or whatever. Here are some things she never said.

• "Well, if all the other kids are doing it, it must be OK"

• "Do your homework later. Watching cartoons is better for you."

• "Let me smell that shirt....READ MORE

EBBEN'S CAR CRASH
Ebben got into a car accident the other day at the Main & Maple intersection.

As the two drivers climbed out of their respective cars, they surveyed the damage.

Both cars are pretty well smashed up, but both were OK.

Ebben pulled out his handy liquor flask and...READ MORE

YES/NO
Ebben's New Hampshire cousin Ephraim wasn't the brightest bulb in the pack, but he was a good sort.

Not too long ago Ebben was getting his car ready for its annual state inspection. He checked the head lights, the emergency brake, but he needed help....
READ MORE

NO PARKING

A man has a chance at a great job.
The interview is in Boston.
He can't find a parking space.
Looking ot the heavens, he cries.....READ MORE

ASKING THE LAWYER

The local philanthropic agency sends
a rep to te richest lawyer in town
seeking for a donation.
Guess what the lawyer says?
ASKING THE LAWYER

GREEN GADGET GUIDE

Nothing like making fun of pretentious folks. Fast Company & Rooftop Comedy take on the oh-so politically correct in this 2009 Green Gadget Buyer's Guide featuring the SMARTERCAR and ANTI-SOLAR PANELS. Check out this link and have a LOL with the Frugal Yankee.
GREEN GADGET BUYER'S GUIDE

THE BIG DECISION

A man has been injured in a car accident.
An operation is needed.
The wife helps in
THE BIG DECISION

IRISH HUMOR - The Contradictor

You meet a lot of different people in an Irish pub.
Heck, any pub for that matter.
Here's a very short story about one.
He's called THE CONTRADICTOR.

AN IRISH JOKE
The boys in the pub have had enough of foreign speaking devils. So they talk, think, drink and then
DECLARE WAR AGAINST THE FRENCH.

THE PERFECT MAN
A man jumps into a taxi in Boston. "Perfect timing" he says the driver. "You're just like Hamilton Rockport."
"Who?" the cabbie asks.
"Hamilton Rockport. The man was incredible. Everything he did was amazing. Perfect timing, perfect teeth, great golfer, terrific swimmer, cooked BBQ to perfection, manners like a diplomat, great taste in clothes, knew wine with the best of them. The guy was simply amazing."
"Yeah, he sounds great. How did you know hm?"
"Oh, I never met the man."
Confused the cabbie asked, "So how come you know so much about him?"
"I married his widow."

OK, this isn't really a tip, but it is funny. Andrew sent us the link and we're posting it here. It's a new internet site, FLUTTER, a microblogging sensation. Check it, and when you're done you can put your tongue back where it belongs.

THE CRANKEE YANKEE
Every once in a while we get in a weird mood. Sometimes it has to be written to be exorcised. Read this with caution, you may end up wearing bib overalls and pining for the good ol' days, when Calvin Coolidge was President.
READ MORE...

A REALLY OLD JOKE
Humor is as old as the hills.
So what were the ancient Greeks laughing at?
Here is a sample.

HOME FOR THANKSGIVING
A Brattleboro father calls his son in Nashville a couple of days before Thanksgiving. He tells him, "I hate to ruin your day, but your mother and I are divorcing......

PRESIDENT-ELECT CONTROVERSY
"Every time Obama opens his mouth, his subjects and verbs are in agreement," says Mr. Logsdon. "If he keeps it up, he is running the risk of sounding like an elitist.....

THE ERSTWHILE PRESIDENT
An elderly man approaches the White House
and starts staring at it.....

DOCTOR JOKE
A doctor says to his patient,
"You have to stop masturbating."
"Why?"
"Because I'm examining you."

GET 60 MPG IN YOUR SUV
No more than ever we need ways to get more mileage per gallon
especially in those big, lumbering examples of excessive consumerism - the SUV.
Here are a few ideas to help you out.

Ferenc Maté's humorous book A VINEYARD IN TUSCANY on rebuilding a 13th-century friary and growing award winning wine. Listen as the Frugal Yankee commiserates.

Alright, we'll admit it. We lifted these THREE CONSTRUCTION JOKES, with some minor remodeling from THIS OLD HOUSE. Hey, if you can't take a joke.....

Back when the Frugal Yankee had no aches and pains from age, folks traded light bulb jokes. We miss them. Here are some LIGHT BULB JOKES collected over the years.

Is there anything better than making fun of old men? Yeah, when you make fun of young men. This one plays well with either crowd. OLD MAN JOKE

THE DANGEROUS BOOK FOR DOGS
by Rex & Sparky
Are we talking about rabid biters? Nope. This new book is a spoof on a similarly named book about boys. Listen as the Frugal Yankees get knee deep in doggy doo-doo and laugh about it with THE DANGEROUS BOOK FOR DOGS.

"AIN'T IT THE TRUTH!"
I was poking around
and found this picture.
It reminded me of the days
when I used to park in Boston.

One of my brother's told me this one this MAINE JOKE other day. It's OK, he's from Maine.

BUMPER STICKERS
Some of the best humor in America resides on the rear end of a $35,000 Japanese import. We have our favorites. What's yours?

JIMMY TINGLE
Humorist Jimmy Tingle shamelessly
plugs the Frugal Yankee. Thanks, Jim.
Check out our conversations with Jimmy!

TREVOR CORSON
One of our favorite authors Trevor Corson, says nice things about the Frugal Yankee in two languages and we didn't have to bribe him. Then listen to Trevor talk about his book THE ZEN OF FISH.

THOSE ENTITLED MILLENIALS
Today's workforce demands praise. Managers are adapting, but at what price? The Wall Street Journal's Jeffrey Zaslow joins the Frugal Yankees to explore this issue. By the way, you look great. Have you been working out?

EXIT, STAGE LEFT
David Jacobson's has excuses, tips and tricks to get out of any social predicament. The Frugal Yankees interview him and join in the fun.

NOODLING CATFISH
There is a unique type of fishing down Missouri way. Professor Mark Morgan aka 'Ozark Mark' reveals the ancient traditions and the revival of 'noodling' or hand fishing where 60 to 100 lb. catfish are caught by hand. No rods, no reels, no nets, just the fish and yourself. Oh yeah, they do bite, that's how you catch them - with your hand in their mouth.

THOSE ROADSIDE MEMORIALS
They are loving, spontaneous, emotional, hand-made and controversial memorials to car crash victims. Frugal Yankees Garen Daly & Louise Reilly Sacco explore where they came from, why they are needed and why some people are angry about them. Listen or download.